One of the most common questions I hear is: ‘Can my ex refuse to follow our visitation schedule?’ The short answer is usually no. If there is a valid court order, both parents are expected to follow it unless the court changes it or there is a genuine emergency involving the child’s immediate safety.
Court Orders Matter
A custody or visitation order is not a suggestion. It is a court order. If one parent simply decides they do not like the schedule anymore, they generally cannot ignore it without risking legal consequences.
When Can a Parent Refuse Visitation?
There are limited situations where immediate action may be necessary, such as when there is a legitimate concern that a child is in imminent danger. Even then, the parent should seek legal advice and ask the court for appropriate relief as soon as possible rather than taking matters into their own hands.
Common Reasons Parents Wrongly Refuse Visitation
- Believing the child does not want to go.
- Disagreements over child support.
- Being angry with the other parent.
- Wanting to change the schedule without a court order.
- Using visitation as leverage during the divorce.
What If My Child Refuses to Go?
Older children may express strong opinions, but parents are generally expected to make reasonable efforts to comply with the court order. A child’s reluctance does not automatically allow a parent to cancel visitation.
What Can the Court Do?
If a parent repeatedly refuses visitation without legal justification, the court may order make-up parenting time, modify custody, award attorney’s fees or sanctions in appropriate cases, or consider the conduct when evaluating the child’s best interests.
My No-BS Advice
Don’t make custody decisions based on anger or frustration. If the current schedule is no longer working or you have legitimate safety concerns, ask the court to modify the order instead of simply refusing visitation. Judges appreciate parents who follow the law and put their children first.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can I refuse visitation because child support has not been paid?
No. Child support and visitation are separate legal issues.
Can my child decide whether to visit?
Not automatically. The court considers many factors, including the child’s age and maturity.
What should I do if my ex keeps denying visitation?
Document what happened and speak with an experienced California family law attorney about your legal options.
Talk to a California Custody Lawyer
At Finan Family Law, we help parents throughout Torrance, Los Angeles County, and the South Bay resolve custody and visitation disputes with straightforward, practical advice. If you’re dealing with a parent who refuses to follow a visitation order—or you’re considering asking the court to change one—we can help you understand your options. Contact us today.